In Loving Memory of Thelma Buffalo Hair
9/11/2003-9/3/2019
It's been a little over a month since I let Thelma slip to the other side of the curtain of life.
Today I went through old photos, and it was like reliving our last 16 years. From the very first day I met Thelma, her zest for life and her impossible cuteness completely stole my heart!
To be responsible for a little life that meant so much to me over the years, and to be the one to say "it's the right thing to do" shattered my heart. In the weeks and days leading up to her death, I was tortured by the thought of letting her go. She was brave, she was always trying to be there for me. Up until her very last days, she tried her best to follow me everywhere. I always thought Thelma was the neurotic one, the one who clung to me with all of her soul, but in the very end, I realized I was the needy one. It was me that needed her almost more than I needed anything else in my life. She was with me through some tumultuous times; there to love me, there to follow and shadow me, there to simply sit still and and get belly rubs and to sing a song. I still miss her with all of my being. It may seem silly to many (except the other dog lovers that are dear friends), but sometimes that one very, very special dog just consumes you with love.
It's been so hard to think about doing a memorial for her. I have her ashes, I have a paw print, I have a tuft of her hair, I have photos, a few videos (never enough). I'm going to share some of her life. If was a long life for a pup, but not long enough. I'd like just one more day with her.
In the past short months, Thelma was able to travel with us to Nags
Head, N.C., and to our annual trip to South Dakota. I'm so grateful that
I had those two final vacations with her. It was time to spend entirely with
her... not having to rush to work, not having to attend to the everyday
stresses of life. On our North Carolina trip, the ocean seemed to
breathe health into her body. The oxygenated sea breeze seemed to give
her a little more of a spring to her step.
We took many trips together. Rick and I opted to drive on all vacations, so
Thelma and Louise could be with us. I hope she enjoyed our many trips to
the Artist Ride in South Dakota, to Yellowstone, to Dunedin Florida,
and all of our trips "home" for the holidays. Her bright, cheery
personality was my shining light. All of my vacations are "working vacations", because I am either seeing out inspiration for future paintings, or attending art shows. To have my "girls" with me on our excursions was a necessity for me, not a choice.
On our final South Dakota trip, Thelma
ate well, she seemed to be in good spirits, and we spent some quality time
together. Thank you, Thelma for sharing that last trip with me. She was
so brave to give me that last gift. It will be very hard on future trips to think that she won't be with me. My life has revolved around my trips to the west, and she has always shared it with me.
Several of my friends shared that one of the things to think about in
evaluating the end days of your pet. One suggestion is to list 5 things they love in life. If
they've stopped enjoying those things, it's time to think about letting
go. In retrospect, these things slipped away so very gradually, almost
imperceptibly. I have a lot more than 5 things to remember of her, so
I'm going to list a few. It's nice to be able to remember her in happier, healthier times.
Things that Thelma loved to do:
- Sing a song
- Chase Vultures in the sky
- Chase the little red laser dot
- Sit in front of the long windows and watch "puppy TV"
- Sit in the sunshine, either in a window, or outside while I was gardening
- Sit in front of the space heater while I was taking a shower
- Crawl under the warm bed covers at bedtime (with her cold nose!)
- Belly crawl across the floor like a frog
Bark at the carpenter bees- Nudge "her" cats
- Young and middle aged Thelma LOVED floppy squeeky toys. She would shake them and shake them
- Run and run and run (and run and run). She delighted in the run. In the house, we called it her "piggy run" because of the way she tucked her little butt under her. It was hilarious.
- Use her "inside voice" to talk
- Sit on the top of the back of the couch (to supervise)
Ride in the car on trips
She was our "Navigator" on our trips- Putting nose prints on the windows!
- Chase seabirds when we went to Florida
- Eat! She loved food! and Treats, Pizza Bones and Ice Cream and liver snacks
- Fluffing a blanket. She would fluff and fluff and fluff, even if it was lumpy in the end.
In the last year or so of her life, she discovered she LOVED belly rubs. Never one to sit still for long, the belly rubs relaxed her and she would be very still.
I hope you found your way home, Thelma.
I still miss you every day, and my heart cries for you. I miss your songs, you were always able to sing me home.
